Single parents: seven ways to be kinder to yourself

Top tips to staying positive

Being a single parent has its ups and downs. But do you sometimes feel there are more downs than ups?

Parenting on your own can be tough, so sometimes it’s important to stop for a moment and ask, “Am I being kind to myself?”

Take look at these tips on how you can give yourself a little TLC:

1. Don’t be hard on yourself – you’re doing a great job and you’re doing your best. And remember that your kids love you, even if they don’t always show it.

2. Find a good circle of friends – support groups are a great place to meet people and make new friends.

3. Learn to forgive others and yourself. It’s a difficult process, and it may be something you have to do on a daily basis, but in the end, the person who will benefit the most is you. You might find it helpful to see a qualified counsellor – it may take a bit of courage, but it could bring you a new sense of freedom to move on in your life.

4. Realise that it’s OK to ask for help – and to accept help.

5. Think of fun ways to involve the children in doing the housework. It will give you practical help and is an opportunity for you all to spend more time together.

6. Use positive self-talk. The things we say to ourselves, out loud or in our minds, can be very powerful. Telling yourself “I can’t do this” or “I’m a failure” isn’t going to help you. It’s usually a downward spiral when you start on the road of negative thinking. Be kind to yourself by starting to change your “I can’t” to “I can”. You will help your children too because they will pick up on having this positive approach. Whenever you start getting a negative thought, stop it in its track and don’t let the thought progress any further. Rather, challenge it and change it into something positive.

7. Every night in bed think of one good thing that happened today. And if it was something you did or handled well, say “Well done” to yourself. Even if it’s been a challenging day, you will be ending it on a positive note.